5 things I’ve learned about Florida

It’s Monday. At least I think it is. I honestly have no concept of days of the week anymore. I just opened 4 cabinet doors in at attempt to remember where I put our water glasses after staring at the spices for at least 30 seconds, completely confused as to why they were in my water glass cabinet. This whole concept of abundant cabinet space is still new to me.

This morning I spent 45 minutes trying to locate my house keys only to realize they were in the pocket of my workout vest. Apparently I felt it necessary to put on a light vest to walk the dog on Saturday morning when the early morning temperature said 59 degrees. This whole concept of walking outside without a coat on is still new to me. Thinking I need a vest when it’s 59 degrees is also new to me and brings me to my first observation:

Humidity hates me. Yes, summers in central Illinois and Chicago should have given me some tolerance for humid climates, but one can only prepare so much. Dad and I arrived ahead of a big storm here in Florida last week so the humidity was pretty high. Not only did I completely overdress on multiple occasions, but my hair began its growth to exponential volume. I know it’s doesn’t look huge here, but this was only day 3. I can assure you that it’s expanding as you read this. Ladies, if you are looking for a new volumizing product, look no further than my extra bedroom here at the new house. I’ll fix you up real good.
Water Spouts and Tornadoes are basically the same thing. And here I thought water spouts were just those things you tried to push your friend’s inner-tube over at Knight’s Action Park so they would flip over and get their hair wet? Dad and I had just left the beach at Siesta Key on Friday to head to the airport when I got a text from Matt asking if we were safe.
I thought it was just his way of pouting because we were on the beach and he was at work, but apparently he was legitimately concerned. My bad. Yes I suppose it was a little windy, but I did not see any swirling of clouds while we were there. Murphy’s luck typically works in our favor and I guess this was no exception. Dad got to see the beach and flew out about an hour under sunny skies. My luck ran out a little without him as I drove through the storm on the way back home, but I was fortunate to just have to deal with heavy rain.
Sundays are best spent at the beach. I’ve always been one to get my errands out-of-the-way on Saturday mornings, but yesterday solidified the fact that Sundays are probably going to be less than productive for us. We are less than 15 miles from what the signs say is the “#1 beach in the U.S. of A” so I have a feeling we will be spending a lot of time there. Come visit us. We’ll need an excuse to go people watch.
Dog parks here have grass. One of the main things we looked for in finding a house down here was either a large backyard or a dog park within walking distance. Kudos to Matt for finding a nearly brand new house with both. After living the cement life for the first year or so, Finn can hardly handle the life of luxury Florida is giving him. Not only does our park have grass but it has tubes to run through, fences to jump over and poles to weave in between. Or in Finn’s case, large objects to run into and trip over while chasing toys. We’ve been spending most of our time in the park, mostly out of my fear that he will get eaten by an alligator if he spends too much time in our backyard.
Eastern time rocks. I’m sure I’ll regret this statement in a month or so, but for now I’m absolutely loving the fact that we are 1 hour ahead of most of our family and friends. Not only do I get to justify sleeping in until 7:00 because it’s only 6:00 in Illinois, but I feel like I’m ahead of the game all day because I have an hour head-start compared to what I use to have. Just think about the possibilities. First one to wish someone a happy birthday, a chance to realize tickets for your favorite band go on sale that day and watching the Today Show in real-time. Groundbreaking stuff here, folks.

Now I just have to remember the time difference when I call to wish my nephew congratulations on his first communion like 4 hours too early.